I don’t know why you do the things that you do
or why you let happen the things that you choose.
I’ve often doubted your wisdom and resented your ways;
not willing to accept what I was facing that day.
Like when I was a young and my friends turned away,
I was sad and alone and tempted to stray
but you taught me the value if I would obey
and brought me a new friend I have to this day.
I went on through school and a nurse I became
my dreams of my childhood were just not the same
I landed a job that allowed me to grow
in ways that prepared me for what I must know.
The trials of a marriage destined not to succeed
taught me reliance on faith for my everyday needs.
Single parenting was hard and many failures I see
Looking back at my choices and need to be me.
But God was right there standing close by my side
keeping me going and being my guide.
A special needs child and another too free
some hard times, some good times, some just meant to be
Though hardships were many and challenges not few
to loving and caring adults they both grew.
My spouse I did meet through your influence as well
A personal ad I did answer, do tell.
We married but struggled in our attempt to unite
our children and habits and expectations weren’t right.
I prayed we’d find closeness and a true family become
But try as we might that “oneness” didn’t come.
Then much to our sadness MS found its way
into the dynamics of family each day
I asked many times “why us?” and I prayed
for a miracle or something to take it away.
But in your wisdom this hardship worked out to our good
We’re closer and happier than we thought that we could.
So, thank you, Lord Jesus, though I don’t understand
I’ll trust you and turn to you, just keep holding my hand.