Being a caregiver is difficult. It’s a lot of hard work; it’s emotionally trying; it’s downright exhausting…but also very rewarding. I try each day to come up with at least one thing that I have done, used, seen, or thought about that I am thankful for, and I highlight that on my Facebook timeline. I admit there are times when it is difficult to find something, but when I struggle to come up with a topic, it also makes me realize how much I have and how truly blessed I am. Today, I want to share with you why I’m thankful that I’m a caregiver.
- I can give back
Lynn has done so much for me since we have been married. He is my #1 cheerleader. He kept our house and cars in working order when he could, but that was just a task. He was also the best chef who has ever cooked for me (I miss that because I don’t like to cook). But more than anything, he was there to share with me in good and bad times, in fun and stressful times. He gave totally and completely to me, and now I can give back—not that I didn’t before, but now it is with focus.
- I can have some control of this situation
One of the most difficult emotions for me is feeling out of control. I cope better when I feel like I have some control over what is happening. By being his caregiver, I can control how well he is cared for; I know what he needs when he needs it, and he likes it done. I can decide how to manage situations in the best interest of us both. I don’t have to call someone else and hope they are paying attention and telling me the truth. I don’t have to worry that he has been ignored or that he is hiding anything from me to spare my feeling—I KNOW what’s going on with him and that knowledge makes my life easier.
- I can share in the two minutes or less joyful moments
I have a very dry sense of humor, and Lynn has a silly one. Together, we can encounter a situation, and between the two of us, often one or the other has a slanted view of what’s happening, shares that perspective, and we share a good laugh. Our sense of humor allows us to face challenges without taking them too seriously and helps us take the edge off the sharpness of our lives. I enjoy those breaks from the seriousness of life; if I did not care for him, I would miss those.
- I have been able to share my caregiving experiences with others and have been blessed by their feedback
Since I began to blog about being an MS Caregiver, I have “met” many others who are also sharing in the experience of “having MS” through the eyes of our loved ones. We each have negative thoughts and emotions that are a natural part of coping with a stressful situation and a high demand for physical and emotional energy. It’s not always a good idea to share those negative emotions with the person cared for….but they must come out somewhere. Being able to share and feel “me too” when I read about someone else’s experiences keeps me from feeling as alone. Others have shared that reading about my situation has helped them as well.
- I have an enhanced sense of purpose
I have always had “purpose,” but now that I am Lynn’s primary caregiver, I feel I have a calling. I feel that God has selected me for the privilege of caring for one of his children. I feel that, for now, my purpose is to make Lynn’s life as comfortable as possible and to fulfill my marriage vows of “in sickness and in health.” God will give me the strength I need to do that when I need it, and when I’m all used up, he will renew my strength. I never have to wonder, “Why am I here.” I know.
I have much to be thankful for—my family, my faith, my health, my job, my church, my friends, my home, and the list goes on and on, but right near the top of that list is that I’m thankful for the opportunity to serve and care for my husband. I’m thankful to be his caregiver.
This article originally appeared on Multiplesclerosis.Net by Health-Union, LLC, and has been reposted with permission.
