Lynn has never been good at sharing information. He’s one of those men who can go to the doctor about a problem, find out he has a new medical condition, start a new treatment program, and when he comes home will say, “The doctor says I’m fine,” or say nothing at all. He did that for years before he was diagnosed with MS. Used to drive me nuts! I have a nursing background and when he came back from the doctor, I wanted to know everything—his blood pressure, what lab work was done, what was the differential diagnosis, what is the treatment plan, what options was he given before he made a choice, etc. Needless to say, I never got that level of detail from him because not only did he not ask those questions but if he did, he didn’t “hear” the answers and could not, therefore, provide any details.
One day after such an experience, I blew up and demanded that I be allowed to accompany him to his next visit. Not only was I going, but I was going to make an appointment for him with a neurologist and he was going whether he liked it nor not! I knew he had MS. I also knew he was not telling the doctor what he needed to share so that the doctor would consider that possibility. THAT was the moment that I truly assumed the beginning of my caregiver role. I decided his medical care was coming under my supervision and that was that!
To read more go to: http://multiplesclerosis.net/living-with-ms/im-the-primary-healthcare-provider/
3 thoughts on “I'm the Primary Healthcare Provider”
I had to laugh when I read this because it reminded me of my brother. Years ago when I was visiting him in Florida, he was suffering from a bad cough, and my sister-in-law insisted he go to the doctor. He agreed and went alone. When he returned, he said the doctor wanted him to drink more alcohol, and that was it. Men can be so funny when it comes to seeing doctors.
That comment actually sounds like something Lynn would have said as well. They just hate to admit that they get sick.
I totally relate! Imagine my shock when my seemingly ok hubby brought home a parking placard from the Dr. We knew about the MS for years. I had no idea about the fatigue he was suffering at work simply on the walk to his desk. He didn’t even have a limp at the time or even use a cane. But with the 20 minute walk that came w lousy parking was taking a toll and took 30-45 minutes to recover from.